gammal-geniune's blog

By gammal-geniune, history, 8 years ago, In English

In the last few days , a lot of people were trying to impersonate me , AbdurRahman ElGammal. I think a lot of people in CF community asked themselves "Who is AbdurRahman ElGammal?" of course NO SURPRISE. Let me tell you about myself so you can know why all those people were impersonating me through these fake accounts.

"They call me life coach or mentor, but I'm just a simple guy with some experience."

As you can see , I am a coach. A really brilliant and amazing coach , the coach of most of Egyptian Legendary Grandmasters on CF like bmerry , Xellos , Swistakk and TsunamiNoLetGo , (and they're also red coders on TopCoder). Of course , My territory expands among a lot of countries (like Iraq , Yemen , Gabon and South Sudan). I think you're wondering why I am so humble and I am saying that I am just a simple guy !! I will tell you my story and you will judge.

I was born in Silicon Valley in 1960. My house is still there , as the same. The only thing that changed about it is 5 letters in the name. It changed from "Gammal HQ" to "Google HQ"

I learnt reading and mathematical basics by the age of 5 days (It's somehow a bit late) but I think it's ok. By the time I was 1 year old , I realised how much embedded systems are important in humans life. But developing systems in that time was really hard , (Thanks God some scientists were able to come up with the first computer later). But I managed to develop the "G++" compiler in my mind. (Don't get Confused , it is not the G++ compiler related to C++) , It is Gammal++ compiler.

Now I've left all this with only one goal. To make the Arab region great again! I've dedicated my life to that goal.

I've spent around 666 days doing research and I was able to calculate certain patterns in the algorithms of the russian coders minds and found the key to their success, and know I'm using that key to open the minds of my trainees. One of the things that I've observed and I'll share it with you as a free sample, is that having sex is the best way to get better at competitive programming. No matter how hard you train, If you don't get laid, you won't get paid.

You've probably heard the rumours that I'm taking advantage of beginners to make money. Well yeah, that's in my resume. You are probably asking why me, why not fegla or HossamYoussef. I know it's a hard choice for a beginner to know what is best for him -TBH I don't know this feeling as I was born an expert in everything- but I think it's pretty obvious, I mean HossamYoussef is just a kid and fegla is ... I mean come on you gotta be kidding.

Now I know a lot of you guys want me to be your coach (or something more but let's keep it here). But the thing is that I got really bored of dumb people trying to become better at topcoder. To be honest I started to hate people because of that. Someone tells me "hey god, please coach me out, I'm red on codeforces!" as if I may believe that he's not dumb because of his CF color. In fact, I decided to become gray on topcoder just to avoid being near these dumb people.Link

But sadly I always feel the need of coaching someone. What would happen to the competitive programming world when I release my AI robots and make them participate in CF and topcoder contests? You gotta have several people to be somewhat in level to compete with them. It wouldn't be cool of humanity to be this beaten by my robots. Or at least that's what NASA said last time they visited me to stare at the awesomeness of my latest work. They wanted me stop making these robots, said it's too dangerous... but why would I? They were so desperate that they even got me a little sad about them, so I made them an offer to host a training camp at their place.

Now don't get too hyped, 99.999% of you are too dumb to join this. I was going to say 100% but then I thought, maybe there is someone who has potential to become great? (lol that's what NASA said) If there are, they gotta attend my lecture or else they won't become great, right? So I thought I'd give it a go... Apply straight from NASA website, I'm sick of your letters guys... Also note that if you thought "what's the cost of registering?" then this camp is not for you, this shouldn't be of your concern... You know, nothing comes in cheap anyway, then what if it's from Gammal?

And finally a surprise to the Codeforces community, You can use the code "Heil Gammal!" with the quotes to get 5% off the cost of the interview leading to my next camp.

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8 years ago, # |
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Can you make me a robot companion like this one but you know better? I need to get laid to become red and I guess if it's a robot the effect will be greater right?

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    8 years ago, # ^ |
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    I sent you an offer with the price. Although judging by the looks of you I already know you can't pay. You look a like a Bulgarian Gypsy get a suit or something.

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8 years ago, # |
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I think that you've learnt to speak before coming to the life :D

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8 years ago, # |
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I'm waiting for Swistakk's response
we will have so much fun :p

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8 years ago, # |
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He forgot to mention that he trained tourist , Petr and all other top rated coders. :p I woke up to take my Suhoor for Ramadan and I was extremely sleepy. But now I can't sleep. :v

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8 years ago, # |
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Jeez! give it a rest already! Here is the real deal: Facebook Profile

I was once introduced to his training, but I had to decline as it was too costy for me!

I'm gonna make it to the top the hard way

End of story

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    8 years ago, # ^ |
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    That's why you're green and not red

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      8 years ago, # ^ |
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      I really can't deny it, but I learnt everything so far on my own, and I'll make it even if I have to be on my own

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        8 years ago, # ^ |
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        I too am learning everything on my own and to be honest the only thing that coaches provides is Guidance which with proper mentality one can attain by itself..I have been a competitive programmer since last 7 months or so but I'm just blue....But I know that we're gonna make it buddy. Have Confidence!

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    8 years ago, # ^ |
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    That's what happens when you're too poor.

    I hate those fake poor people who try to be as awesome as I am.

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      8 years ago, # ^ |
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      "Better the poor whose walk is blameless than the rich whose ways are perverse"

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8 years ago, # |
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You probably thought that I'm joking here http://codeforces.me/blog/entry/45280#comment-298271, but note how that is connected with Errichto's 2876 rating and brilliant advice "having sex is the best way to get better at competitive programming".

Kinda typical that after great success (TOP150 in #349 and 251 in 2nd round of RCC here) there are always people who try to assign your success to them :||. Are those tons of Indians of Arabs sending me friend requests on Facebook also my coaches? Dear Gammal, I guess you just mistaken yourself with Gumball, great cartoon which I recently get to know and learnt a lot of life lessons from him.

Btw regarding to phrase "make the Arab region great again!" -> pic related

(of course from the one and only https://www.facebook.com/PraiseTheEmpress/?fref=photo fanpage)

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    8 years ago, # ^ |
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    tourist must be secretly doing her

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    8 years ago, # ^ |
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    I do it with my hand before every contest
    but I'm still blue :p

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      8 years ago, # ^ |
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      so* you're still blue

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        8 years ago, # ^ |
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        How does it feel to be inferior to Swistakk because I never trained you? You can change that for the right price

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          8 years ago, # ^ |
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          Today realized that some intelligent men are creeps :P Reading the comments made me sick!

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            8 years ago, # ^ |
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            You have a very low standard for the word "creep"

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              8 years ago, # ^ |
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              What do you mean?

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                8 years ago, # ^ |
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                I'm suggesting that this behavior is normal and doesn't warrant the title of "creep"

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    8 years ago, # ^ |
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    Having too much sex with girls I hook you up with causes memory loss.

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8 years ago, # |
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Xellos, the Egyptian xD!

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8 years ago, # |
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Plot twist: that guy is secretly from India and advice "having sex is the best way to get better at competitive programming" is his way to fight with low birth rate in India.

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    8 years ago, # ^ |
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    Not funny at all , Mr Swistakk -_- There is a fine line between trying to be funny and being insulting.

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      8 years ago, # ^ |
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      Sorry if that sounded insulting, but I didn't mean it to be such. Everybody wants to be better no matter of his rating and I chose India simply as the most numerours country in competitive programming, so such action would have the biggest impact, nothing more than that (however probably low birth rate there is not true :D). Action fighting with low birth rate in specific country have already been conducted https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vrO3TfJc9Qw :P

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        8 years ago, # ^ |
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        They stole the idea from me, I invented the do it for X campaign.

        Do it for rating

        Do it for Egypt

        Do it for NASA

        Do it so one day you're as hot as subscriber

        All my inventions. Those thieves have no shame.

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8 years ago, # |
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8 years ago, # |
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Where is Xellos ? :/
maybe he has died after reading the post :D