For the last year I:
could increase my rating only by 34, failing my goal to reach CM,
lost National Olympiad at Informatics and two olympiads held by universities after a year of intensive studying,
didn't manage to get selected for any competitive programming courses,
haven't improved my English, haven't practiced it for years,
haven't improved my math,
got expelled from algorithm group for no reason (or maybe because I accused them of not preparing me for olympiads when they promised to do so, but that's another story),
I still don't understand what on earth I'm living for. I don't know anything, and I need to go to university in 6 months. I know only CP, and it turned out that I know it very bad. I know it so bad so that even my groupmates (former as i'm expelled) have made a Div3 while I'm still sitting around.
These failures always did follow me, do follow me and will do follow me, and I will always be so dumb to learn something harder than how to cin/cout.
I don't know what to do.
Edit: go on! downvote me! i like it so much!
Don't give up man
When i get to phases like this i always think
Life is like a spring, The more it pushes you down the higher you go up.
I have seen my highs and lows and honestly i can feel where you are
but yeah just think that God didn't make me to stay low, He has plans and i just need to follow my heart.
All the best <3
Thanks for reply! I don't give up, I have already done this. That's all I can say buddy.
не волнуйся брат я в тебя верю
Спасибо, конечно, но смысл? У меня уже вряд ли что-то интересное будет
все будет хорошо всему свое время
мое время уже вышло
Just remember that you are living to know, love, and serve God, which might come from doing competitive programming to a degree, but it might not. Either way, at the end of your life, would you rather be the person who did or didn't do their best to follow in the footsteps of Christ? I know, it is a very hard thing to do. But that is what we all should be working towards. Also, if you do not enjoy this thing anymore, then there is no reason not to quit.
I don't believe in "God", there's no goodness in my life. I guess I'll just move on believing that I starve not because I'm a descendant of some sinner.
Could a person sentenced to death say they don't believe in the electric chair and not get electrocuted because of it?
bro believe me u are going to reach CM in next 3 months of practice , all the best!!!
No, don't believe!!!
This might be a good starting point to be better..
No
Too much effort to just let it go .. finish what you started
There's no sense of doing that anymore
I don't know anything, and I need to go to university in 6 months.I think you can participate in ICPC as a university student
And surely get nothing because to get at top-50 teams in semifinals is nearly... impossible. I know two guys, first guy went to semifinal because there were no good teams at his 1/4, but got a place at end of the table at 1/2, another one stopped at 1/4 because their one was much harder.
Get better and that could be possible
I tried, that's impossible
Top-50 teams were at your level and they didn't stop so why you?
My level? Are you sure? I'm million miles away from them
Yes they were at your level one day so Why quitting too early?
Because to become one of them I need to spend at least a dozen of my lifes.
Maybe less..
well, is never late to make a change in your life.
first, you should try harders problems if you want to researh the cm rank, (you have a lot of 800 rank, but a average of 10 problems in the others colors). So if you want to research the new color, trying more difficult problems, and take your time, at the start there will be difficult, but with practice you can research your objetives.
And the other thing, you have to learn alone if you haven't someone, it a little dificult, but with the internet, there is not stop now.
Also you can try different things, you can try to code a proyect, if you say you didn't know anything (i think i don't belive of you), so start learn something you like. A good news, you have problems solving skill, something a lot of people need.
So, not let a fall make go to depeer, get up and start a new cycle in your life :D, good luck, i wait you can get your new objetives :p